9 Ways To Confidently Attract Women
Confidence is a highly attractive quality to women. It surpasses physical appearance and gentlemanly behavior as the trait that makes a woman want to become intimate. The scene in Goodfellas where Ray Liotta escorts Lorraine Bracco to the Copa exemplifies the power of confidence. Author R. Don Steele explains that females want a man who can protect and provide, which is an evolutionary desire. To be more attractive to women, exude confidence without being boisterous. Here are some effective techniques to do so.
1) According to R. Don Steele, author of Body Language Secrets: A Guide during Courtship and Dating, women evaluate your appearance and gait. Therefore, dress fashionably and maintain impeccable grooming. Ashley Rothschild, an image consultant in Los Angeles, suggests emulating the style of successful professionals in your field. She also recommends a classic leather jacket, à la Steve McQueen.
As for your pace, slow down. “Confidence is not in a hurry,” advises Steele, “but there’s a distinction between meandering and walking deliberately. Always walk as if you know what you’re doing and where you’re going.”
2) When complimenting a woman, avoid staring at her feet or gazing away, as it can signal insecurity or disinterest. Instead, lock eyes with her or focus on her mouth, suggests Renee Piane, author of Love Mechanics. Compliment her realistically, such as her beautiful eyelashes, rather than using exaggerated or insincere statements.
3) When someone compliments your appearance, respond with a simple “thank you” and a smile, advises Susan RoAne, author of How to Work a Room. Avoid deflecting compliments by questioning or downplaying them, which can come across as insecure. Instead, graciously accept the praise.
4) Contact Her Within 48 Hours. Don’t wait too long to use the number she gave you or risk looking immature or hesitant. Treat the call like a professional one if you’re nervous.
“Be action-oriented like executives who gather information and quickly start projects. Use these tactics in your personal life,” recommends Judith Coche, a clinical psychologist and professor at the University of Pennsylvania. “If you’re unsuccessful, move on. It’s not personal rejection, it’s about making things work,” adds Coche.
5) To display confidence when leaving a voicemail, speak in a moderately loud and deep voice. Before calling, stand up and hum for a bit to bring your voice to the ideal pitch. Begin by stating your name, where you met, and the reason for your call. Don’t seek her approval but ask a question that presupposes her interest, such as “How soon would you like to get together?” Leave your number and request that she call you back. If she doesn’t, try calling her again in a couple of days.
6) When discussing yourself, focus on the positive aspects. Concentrate on your best traits and the hobbies you are most enthusiastic about. “Provide the ‘press release’ version of yourself,” suggests Kate Wachs, a psychologist and author of Relationships for Dummies. “Share all the good things about your life that you would be happy to see in large print on the front page of the newspaper the following day.”
7) Having knowledge can boost your confidence. Are you familiar with the appropriate seating position during a dinner date? According to Steele, you should always sit at a 90-degree angle to your date instead of facing her directly. If your date sits at the head of the table, you should sit in the first seat to her left.
To avoid being too aggressive, turn your waist towards her, allowing her to turn towards you. “Women don’t appreciate full-frontal assaults because it’s intimidating,” says Steele. “A confident man understands that he should let the woman have the choice to turn to him, and he is confident that she will.”
8) To avoid cognitive diversion, be direct with your intentions. If you want to enter her apartment, tell her at the door without making excuses. If you want to kiss her goodnight, go for it without asking for permission. According to Kate Wachs, asking for permission to kiss someone can shift the focus to the cognitive realm and ruin the emotional moment.
9) Don’t be threatened by a successful woman who earns more than you. A confident man sees it as a positive trait. “Single women earning $60K+ annually are seeking loving partners,” says Coche. “They’re more selective and can afford to prioritize their partner choice.” Remember, she wouldn’t be with you if she didn’t consider you a great catch. When you believe it yourself, she’ll be convinced too.